“He it is Who created you, but one of you is a disbeliever and one of you is a believer.  And Allah is Seer of what  you do.” Surah 64:2

I usta think the above verse was solely talking about two different people…you know like, a husband and a wife…or two believers…but the more I study myself the more I have started to think it can also be talking about one person…a person who God knows has issues, issues with submitting our will to His.

When I read it now, it reads like…

“Your initial creation, you know the one that naturally inclines toward righteousness…God is responsible for…but, this hybrid you are now…yeah, that’s all you…and all that trifling stuff you do when you think no one is around…um, yeah, God sees you.”

Just a lil’ something to think about…

Bismillah!

“The day when they come forth. Nothing concerning them remains hidden from Allah. To whom belongs the kingdom this day?  To Allah, the One, the Subduer (of all).  This day every soul is rewarded what it has earned.  No injustice this day! Surely Allah is Swift in Reckoning. And warn them of the day that draws near , when hearts, grieving inwardly, rise up to the throats.  The iniquitous will have no friend, nor any intercessor who should be obeyed.  He knows the dishonesty of eyes and that which the breasts conceal.  And Allah judges with truth. And those whom they call upon besides Him judge naught!  Surely Allah is the Hearing, the Seeing.” Surah 40:16-20

No matter how much we want that person stricken with leprosy RIGHT NOW for doing us wrong…it won’t happen unless God wants it too.

No matter how much we want that person relieved from his/her post RIGHT NOW for doing us wrong…it won’t happen unless God wants it too.

No matter how much we want that person to feel the same pain we are feeling RIGHT NOW for doing us wrong…it won’t happen unless God wants it too.

Sometimes God just wants to see what we’re gonna do when we are tried. Many of us quote scripture all day long… (me included)Vengeance is mine saith the Lord…forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.  But, I gotta say, we don’t really think about the scriptures…if we did we wouldn’t pray that way…cuz if God forgave us like we forgive we’d be messed up. Do we really believe in a day of judgement or is it that we just don’t have patience with God?  I mean do we really believe that there is a God of justice? Do we really believe God has our back?  If so, how do we show it?  Especially when adversity strikes?    When we’re in a relationship and something happens that we don’t like…even though we SAY everything happens by Allah’s permission…how do we react? Do we take it to God first or do we want the whole world to know our version of said events? (And Allah judges with truth. And those whom they call upon besides Him judge naught! ) God knows our pain…look how that above scripture talks about “when hearts, grieving inwardly, rise up to the throats” Y’all know them kinda tears that be all up in your throat…can’t even breath…He knows, let Him be our salve…let Him send His tranquility!  I know its easier said than done…but its doable and gets easier with time…just have to TRY GOD.

I’m just saying…maybe, just maybe if we tried doing what we say we believed, God would handle our hurt and the ones who hurt us. When we take our minds off revenge we can get more good accomplished…when we take our minds off of looking for evidence in cellphones, computers, and emails we probably could find a cure for cancer or at least ourselves in a better relationship…

Bismillah….

So, I was up this morning reading the Quran and ran across this scripture…

Surah 41:23-”And that, your (evil) thought which you entertained about your Lord, ruined you, so you have become of the lost ones.”

It’s hard to admit to oneself that you have the audacity too be mad at the Lord of the worlds…I mean even I have the good sense to know that I shouldn’t go there…but there I go.

I know that God tries us all…the Quran tells us that we are given what?,  at least two severe ones annually…so what is it about us that makes us buck when we face one? Seeing as though God knows us best…He did form us in our mothers wombs didn’t he?  He knows what to try us with to extract impurities from of us, to make us better people…something we have all asked for…but then the trial sets in a we wild out…

So a couple years ago God hit me with a trial years in the making…a trial that coldcocked me…so hard  like in Ali knocking out Liston…so after I realized what happened I realized I was mad at God…I was like, “for real God…really….. but I’m on my Deen…how could you? I so do not deserve this! That is all all types of wrong!” So, I shift from gratitude praying to how could you/judgemental praying….dangerous territory, man…and the bad part about it is that I didn’t even realize it was happening…I was so wrapped up in my pain, that I didn’t keep a tab on my spiritual pulse…and when you don’t do that it’s very easy too flatline. So for a while, things started going from bad to worse; and I couldn’t figure out why…probably because I was asking the wrong questions.

One of the things Minister Farrakhan states is that when you ‘re going through a trial, you have to study the trial.  You must look into it and extract the lesson.  Trust the lesson is not “God, I don’t deserve this!” nor is it “God, you ‘re bogus for this one!”

Now, don’t get me wrong, I didn’t outright say these things…but truss I truly felt this way…and as the scripture above says…I was lost.  I couldn’t find my way back to a peaceful relationship with God, and as we know when your relationship with God is jacked up…all others closely follow…I was lost from what things made me happy…I couldn’t find joy in anything….why? In my honest opinion it’s because I was entertaining “evil thoughts about my Lord” and until I got it together I was …as my church fam would say…blocking  my “blessings (-:)

The point? When we’re going through something…or even if we’re not we gotta always check our spiritual pulse and our attitude cuz nobody humbles like The God! It’s ok to question God…just keep it humble! (Jesus did ask, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”)  It’s even ok to not understand why you’re going through something…just pray for understanding with a humble heart..recognize you’re talking to God and ain’t trying to catch an aneurysm in this piece.

I know it’s been a minute, but when I see something I like, I just gotta share it…so here it is…(-: Nothing over $40.

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My take on the movie is a lil’ bit different. Although I do see , understand and agree with the commentary that has been given on the continual diss of the black male in front of the entire world…I must say for the record HILL HARPER  portrayed a positive black male character…unless he did something real crazy in the first 20 minutes (cuz I was late).

Despite the critics trashing it and other negative reviews, in my opinion, I think the movie brought to light a lot of issues that we are dealing with in our community. To name a few (not in order of importance): emasculated black men, crazy parents, promiscuity, teen pregnancy, veterans not being cared for(economically or emotionally), alcoholism, big I’s little U’s, hypocrisy in religion, infidelity, abuse, poverty, abortion, Claire Huxtable not getting her due, low self esteem, fertility issues, HIV, rape, cheap wigs, haunted by past mistakes, relationship issues, the fact that Idris Elba should’ve been at least a mailman in this flick and cultivating true sisterhood.  All are important and realistic issues we are dealing with that can’t be easily dismissed. We must really and truthfully look at our community and see where we fit in eradicating things that negatively impact our community.

I remember the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan telling the sisters that we “had lost touch with the women.” As I watched this movie, I was over whelmed with the fact that I know some of these girls that are portrayed, I was/am some of these “girls”… I gotta ask myself, have I lost touch? When I watched the movie, I couldn’t get away from the thought that there are “girls” who currently live these lives and incorrectly think they are not able to escape the pain of there own realities. There are “girls” who do not know the reality of God, however you see Him. Yes, I cried at all the appropriate times and was straight shocked when Raheem did that to Princess Tiana (damn where Bishop at when you need him???), but at the end of the day, it was just a movie and reality is waiting right outside our door or inside our own homes.  Isn’t it our responsibility to at some point let our “girls” know that they are NOT in fact “colored”?  That they are the progeny of God…made in His image…not a colored, or altered version.   Oh, no “girl”, you are so much more…you are God’s little “girl”.  But, who is going to tell/show them and remind us of this TRUTH!???? Isn’t it up to those of us who claim to know otherwise?

If anything, though, I’m sure this was not Mr. Perry’s complete motivation, this movie was a reminder…a visual reminder that even though some of us may have children, health issues, some of us may have husbands, some of us may have nice fashion related employment and wear oh so fabulous leather tops and bangin’ stilettos…(sorry the fashionista was trying to escape…ssshhhh, HM…this blog is not about fashion) we are all connected with those of us who don’t have what we think we have and even more, still we are all sisters and we have a mission.  Like Sister Nojma Muhammad said in her review entitled No Apologies , “While sitting in the theater watching ‘For Colored Girls….’ I began to feel intense pain, not just the pain of the characters but the movie will also make you focus on your personal pain. I looked around and I saw the same pain reflected on the faces of my Sisters.” I had the same experience, we went as a group of sisters the other day (shout out to Mo, Noni, Mena, Mattie and Charnie) and we sat there for a minute absorbing all that we had seen…we honestly had to take a minute… As we cried watching the scene with the children (you know what scene if you saw it) how many of us (meaning all that have seen the movie) have the same emotion when we walk past a shelter where women and their children are seeking refuge from similar situations? So, we shed some tears, now what?  I could tell all of us were thinking about the collective pain of our “girls” and wondering how we could help more.

Real talk, I’m asking myself this same question.  Now, I understand, we are busy.  But, I’m asking us to ponder the question of our responsibility to our community.  Does our responsibility to our communities range outside of raising our OWN children properly or living our own lives as what we think is proper and right?  I’m married to a minister/self employed hip hop activist (hey babe!), I home school my two children, am active in the mosque, am in school, I study, and oh yes you best  believe I’m that Proverbs 31 Chick!  But, that doesn’t negate my responsibility to my community. I gotta do more and consistently so. Please don’t think that I’m undermining all our respective responsibilities….Lord knows I’m not…I’m just encouraging us to occasionally look outside our own stuff to the grander cause.  I know it’s hard…I fell off with my own stuff last year dealing with a trial that I know was directly from God and am fighting/clawing my way back to working this thing…so yeah, it’s real we are going to deal with our own issues, but that doesn’t change what we have to do.  All through out Torah, Bible, and Qur’an we see women handling God’s business despite what they got going on…All through our personal interactions with real life everyday women we see them handling our communities business despite what they got going on in their own personal lives…

I don’t want to be a religious hypocrite…at home judging when I know I have a big ole log cabin in my eye. Its not easy, but I know for a fact that it has to be done.  God’s guidance always appears in the actions of a person effecting positive change.  I’m not saying that we have to just roll out all willy nilly (yeah I said willy nilly…lol) but we can all do something to help others…  to build a “girls” self perception and help change realities. We gotta seek refuge in God…ask Him what He wants us to do…roll up our sleeves… be more organized…and do what God told us to do.

Patrice Muhammad has her own radio talk show where she addresses such issues.  Shirley Muhammad has her own non-for profit that address such issues. Adilah Muhammad is working for the homeless. Aminah Hanan is blogging for righteousness.  Audrey Muhammad  is the founder of Virtue Magazine. Beatrice X is on the ground and helping first hand with Oscar Grant’s family. MoMo Willy is building self esteem one verse at a time.  I’Aisha Eybers has been working miracles for a minute with our youth.  Yeyide Kmt has been encouraging Black Mommies for quite sometime. Orlana Darkins is helping young people Shyne year round. Toya Jones is a counselor helping shape mental realities every day. Kimberly Ellis is raising a collective conscious as an educator, activist, and performer. Cherwanna Thurmond volunteers by being a Big Sister. Reshonda Smith brought new underwear for some children who needed it just because they did. There are so many more sisters out there doing their thing! My point?  It can be done!  How do I know, because all the sisters I’ve mentioned are either students, or have either children, jobs, or husbands (some are all of the above) and are active in their respective communities in their own way.

We gotta put our emotions in check and rise into the thinking of God!  God doesn’t let His free will having children frustrate what He’s got going on.  God handles His business er’ day!  Our mission is aligned with God and it doesn’t have to be the same as the sisters I mentioned above…cuz we all have our own gifts, talents, circumstances and assignments.  It can be supporting the sisters we know…it can be that word of much needed encouragement…it can be inviting someone to the very thing that has improved our lives…it can be being a mentor/an example… it can be volunteering once a month, it can be attending something a sister has put together, it can be as simple as listening…or as huge as donating funds…We all know what are capable of doing by God’s grace…I’m just asking us so called “Concious Girls” to step up our game and actually do it(-:

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In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, The Merciful

As Salaam Alaikum!

“Do you enjoin men to be good and neglect your own souls while you read the Book? Have you then no sense?”

Holy Quran 2:44

This particular scripture stuck out to me in today’s reading… I think its because it warns against hypocrisy while showing us what is best for us.  Its easy to point out what others are doing wrong and talk about how people should pray, eat right, live right…whatever soap box sermon we’re on for the day…but what about how I’m living my own life?  Am I out trying to change the world and neglecting to change me?

It’s interesting to me that this is in day one as well, because we are all “read(ing) the Book”… I want to have “sense”….I don’t want to neglect my own soul…The bible says it like this, “For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” Matthew 16:26 and Mark 8:36

So, this Ramadan I’m going to strive, by God’s permission, to focus the magnifying glass on myself and as Surah 2:67 says, “seek refuge with Allah from being on of the ignorant.”